The Art of Goodbye
In my mind, the true art of goodbye lies in being able to say hello. To be willing and open to meeting new people despite all the goodbyes you’ve said before. A difficult goodbye usually comes about because you are willing to say hello to someone, and the hardest goodbyes are to those who are nearest and dearest to us.
We recently said some tough goodbyes as a family. We had to part ways with our two sweet foster babies—unfortunately, the foster program for foreigners that we were participating in halted unexpectedly. We only had six short weeks with E and B, but they will remain forever in our hearts. We pray that they are soon found and adopted by their forever families or that the program can resume. We are so grateful we got to be a small part of their stories, and they will forever be a part of ours.
“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot.”
There is a quote about grief that I have been reflecting on over this past week as I miss those sweet babies:
“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go” – Jamie Anderson
The farewells to B and E are just the start of the goodbyes we will face in the coming months. As the school year wraps up for our kids, many families will leave early for time back in their home countries. This includes friends of ours and of the kids. Although we have been in Ethiopia for less than eight months, we have had the privilege of meeting and doing life with some truly wonderful people.
Our last day with E and B
The goodbyes from leaving America are still pretty fresh for us, and now we are facing another round of goodbyes. One always hopes goodbyes are really just a “see you soon,” but one never knows. One of the hardest things to do as a parent is finding the balance between teaching our kids the art of saying goodbye well and still being open to saying hello.
“Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.”
It takes courage to do both. Goodbye means walking into pain and loss. Hello means opening oneself up by being vulnerable, although loss is a potential. One of my favorite quotes is, “Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.” I usually have to repeat it as a refrain to myself when I am in the midst of loss to remind myself it is worth it. Frequent goodbyes are common to this life we are called to. Cross-cultural workers move frequently either back to their passport countries, to other countries, or within the same country (as we are doing).
We are so thankful for our friendships from America and all of the relationships we have made this year that make saying goodbye (or see you soon) so hard. If you are reading this, you are likely one of those we miss or will miss dearly. We are so grateful for y’all’s support and prayers this past year. Our family has been so lucky to have formed truly special friendships that have helped sustain us in this season of transition but also leave us ready to say “Hello” to the next person placed in our path.
Praises
Our family is healthy! Thank you to those who prayed for us after our last update. Our family was hit hard by random illnesses that wouldn’t stop, but we seem to be in a good spot right now.
Rest: We attended a conference over the kids’ spring break period and caught up on rest, but we were also refreshed and encouraged and have gained a new vigor to tackle our remaining time here in Addis Ababa.
Things to Pray for:
Forever families for E and B: Ethiopia no longer allows foreign adoptions. Please pray for the Ethiopian families that will come along and treasure these precious babes as their own.
Rachel’s Parents: They are currently traveling and simultaneously trying to gather their authenticated documents together for their long-term visa.
Tsehye: She is a super sweet woman who has been helping us out by cleaning, cooking Ethiopian food, and doing local shopping. We would appreciate it if you could pray for us to help find her another position when we move in a few months.
Pray for the kids as they prepare for another transition in a few months. Pray for us, as their parents, to help them navigate these “big feelings” as we are walking in our own.
Pray for the logistics of moving again. It’s one thing to be able to rent a U-Haul and move everything from one town to another in the States; it’s a little harder here.
Pray for our team to grow! We recently had some great conversations with recruiters and mobilizers from around the world and would love for people to feel the call to come and help us spread His light.
If you have any prayer requests, we would love to hear from you. If you would like to set up a video chat, send us a message! You can contact us on WhatsApp or email us at LCRC@cobosethiopia.org.
If you want to learn more about how to help us on this journey, please click the link below!
